what i own

i am 29. this is what i own. mm. i pause a lot to think about this. i never ascribed numbers to anything...really, in terms of what a number would mean, REALLY, if it were of any significance, etc...because i guess, in general, my numbers never added up. i just met a dude, a savvy business dude, who told me in all seriousness, that: 'it doesn't have to be this way.' he believed himself right out of debt. when you're down, almost everyone is a prophet. and you look to believe almost everyone. and you owe almost everyone - not just economically. or it feels that way. it feels that i look to almost everyone, every sign, every blue and yellow and green parakeet on the street, every graffiti word scrawled on my way to work, every thing a stranger says to me, as SOMETHING. meaning-in-everything...as you strive to make meaning. or MAKE something. or MAKE yourself. and then you look up, right? and maybe you're the last girl on the dance floor, and it's 6 am, and it's time to go home. and at that point i would, yes, like to have a bed and a home and a spot and a nook to roll in to. a permanent parking spot. monday through sunday.